Some great news

Yesterday started out with getting rid of my chemo pack that was attached to me......woohoo, that alone was exciting.....I'm FREE. I didn't have to worry about when I would get up and go somewhere that I would get reminded that I had a pack that I had to take with me. I looked at my port in my chest and it looks like a bruise. I'm not sure if that's because it is a bruise or that my skin is so pale that you can actually see the color of the port under my skin. The port is purple. Kinda weird.

Next, I had my appointment with my oncologist and Rob and my mom accompanied me so that they could ask questions if they wanted to and to hear what she had to say. We talked about taking some digestive enzymes to help me out with digestion. Digestion is a little harder without my gallbladder and missing apparently a very large portion of my pancreas. Dr. Huang showed us a comparison of CT scans of my pancreas before and after surgery and it's almost half of what I started out with. But everything seems to be working well and it's a good thing I'm not so into sweets these days, might be a little rough on my little pancreas.

Then, Dr. Huang told me that there was one good thing that she saw on my last CT scan when I was in the hospital and it was the margin of the mass inside me and that the margin was shrinking. IT'S SHRINKING!!!! I about busted out of my skin, did a little a dance (I'm dancing, I'm dancing). All I can say as I sit here softly crying is that these are tears of joy and thank-you thank-you for all your prayers because they are working!!!! We will make it through this, without a doubt. I have no doubt!

Now for some more cool news is that I have the entire month of November off from Chemo. I asked Dr. Huang if we can do a PET scan (this scan messures the growth of cells by lighting up the glucose they use to divide and create new cells) and we'll be doing the scan but I have to be finished up with radiation first or it messes up the results of the scan. So I finish radiation on Nov. 6th and then we're going to do the scan the 23rd or 24th of Nov. Then I have a meeting with the Dr. on my birthday (the 30th) and then I start Gemzar chemo again on Dec. 1st.

I was wrong as to how the new sessions of chemo are going to progress, but I get it now. So I still have 9 sessions of Gemzar to go. So it's 3 weeks in Dec. and one week off then another 3 weeks and one week off and then the final 3 sessions. So if my body can tolerate it all and I don't have to skip any weeks I'll be done with chemo on Feb. 9th, 2010. The Dr. did say that this is going to be a little harder on my system and we'll be looking very closely at my lab results, which right now btw ARE AWESOME!!!! So if my counts are too low then we would skip that week and then try again the next week.

I have been so very fortunate to have so little issues compared to what could have happened that this will be the real test of how my body can handle this.

I'm proof that positive thoughts and all your prayers are working so please please don't stop, I love you all so very much and can't say thank-you enough. We are so very blessed to have such awesome family and friends and we wouldn't be in such a great place without all of you.

Until next time,
Kate

Just a little update

Things are going well, my energy is pretty good on most days and all my levels are very good. The only thing that is a little low is my platelets, but they are still ok. Most days I'm up in the a.m. and just get through waking up, taking meds and vitamins and getting ready to get picked up to go to radiation can be quite the chore. As of my last check up with the nurse I'm weighing in at 255 now and I'm pretty sure that's what I weighed when I met Rob in 1999. Amazing huh. It feels awesome even though everything isn't quite bouncing back like I thought it all would. Guess the weight came off too fast. Regardless it makes me happy.

I don't really have any secrets as to how the weight has come off, but I do tend to survive on cheese quesadillas. There's enough cheese in there to make the two sides stick together so pretty low on calories. But they are one of the things that doesn't bother my system and I don't have to take anything. It's kind of an on going joke with mom and I since she thinks I should eat things that have more nutrician in them. Moms.........lol But seriously, it really has to do with portion control and I just have a much smaller stomach, so it decides when I'm done even though I would love to eat more, I just can't. Old habits try to sneak in, but I do my best to stop them.

On Tuesday the 27th I was going to be done with radiation and chemo together but I found out yesterday that I have to do so more radiation, an additional week and a half. I guess it's good to do it now, just to keep the process going, but I was really looking forward to it being done. But if the Dr. thinks that I need more who am I to complain.

So that's the latest update. I don't start chemo again until Nov.17th and that's the Gemzar again and possibly another chemo agent. I'll be talking with my oncologist on the 27th to see what the plans are and also get her to give me a PET scan. I would really like to know what's going on in my body rather than all this speculation about whether or not the cancer is back and where it is. Just need to know.

Thank-you, thank-you to everyone for all your prayers and wonderful positive thoughts, we wouldn't be able to get through all of this without all of you.

Until next time,
Kate

How things are going....

Surprisingly enough, things are going very well. I've just started my 3rd week of chemo and radiation and I haven't had too many side effects happen. My abdomen is a little sore where the radiation goes, but no outward signs of burns or anything like that. My blood counts are awesome, just like a "normal" person, which all in all is awesome to say the least. Going to radiation everyday is getting a little annoying, but what can ya do, it's not going to last forever.

Carrying around my chemo everywhere with me is kind of drag, occasionally I forget that it's there and try to walk off without it. I get a friendly reminder that I'm attached to the machine and it drags me back. The 27th is my day of freedom from the chemo/radiation and then I'm supposed to have 4 weeks off before we start with the Gemzar again, but that may be up in the air. My oncologist may want to add another chemo agent to add to the Gemzar and I'll know more about that when I see her on the 27th.

All in all things are going well.

Thank-you everyone for you help and support I don't know what I would do without all of you!!!
Love you all,
Kate

Wigs!!!

So what be the fun of having no hair if I didn't have any wigs. We have only named one, if you have any suggestions for the other 2 let's hear 'em. The very top one has a name and that's Lola. Not sure why, but it seems to fit. Lol. I must say that my head is not bumpy at all and it's a pretty good shape........lol And let's talk low maintenance shall we??? Not that I fussed a lot about myself before, but this put a new spin on low maintenance.

Hair Day!!!!

Ok, so here's the long awaited pictures of "The shaving of my head"!!! It was actually very relaxing, very different experience, but one that so needed to be done. Rob did an excellent job and he'll be in charge of the up keep. Right now with the chemo that I'm on, it's not attacking my hair follicles like the Gemzar did so I actually have some hair growth. Enjoy the pictures!!!

Another step has started.

A few things have happened as of late. Mom and I had a good "retail therapy" day on Sunday. We went to the outlets in Vacaville and went to Coldwater Creek. What a cool store, very earthy and all those browns, how could I resist and how did I not know about this place earlier??? It is official, I'm wearing a size 24 in jeans now, I can't remember when or how long it's been since I wore that size, heck I may have even skipped that size, just don't remember. After Vacaville we went back to Fairfield and went to Lane Bryant and I got one of those bras that was shown on Oprah, the one that doesn't give you lines on your back. It's very cool and super comfy. Mom of course remembered that I needed to have labs done before chemo so we raced to Vallejo so I could get my blood drawn and I was ready for Monday.

Monday came and went. The radiology/oncology dept. called me and said their machine was down, so I wasn't able to come in and start radiation. Since I wasn't able to start radiation they didn't want me to start the chemo either. So now it's Tuesday and Rob and I went to radiation. It's just a big x-ray like machine that rotates around to do the top and bottom of my body. Didn't feel anything, just layed there. I've heard that there's a cummlative effect and that it's like a bad sunburn. Oooohhh something to look forward to........lol

After radiation Rob and I went to Vacaville to get my chemo. I've started the 5-FU and it's being infused. That means that I have a little pack that's attached to me with a dispensing unit that gives me small doses of chemo. At first I was told that I would have it for 5 days and then I would get disconnected and then hooked up again after the weekend. Not my luck. I'm doing 7 days of chemo, so every Tuesday I'll go in and they will just change the dressing and give me a new pouch of chemo. Oh yeah, so I can't get any of this wet, so showering is going to have to get creative. So far I'm not feeling any effects of the chemo, which is good, but it could be cummlative also, but I'm hoping since it's going in so slow that my body will be ok with it.

It's time. This weekend Rob is going to shave my head, or I should say, buzz my head. Miss Emily will finally get to play with my hair and give me a mohawk and we'll spray it pink. Yes there will be lots of pictures taken, before and after. I think it's time to model my wigs too, so there will be pics of those also.

I know this gets repetitive, but I can't thank everyone enough for all your thoughts and prayers, it really means so very much to Rob and I.

Love you all,
Kate

Another trip to the ER you say???

Wednesday night Rob and I had dinner and I felt like I had over eaten, but I hadn't, and I figured it would just go away. So when you know you've over eaten and then your abdomen gets even tighter and hurts more before it gets better, well it never got better. I made it through the night thinking by morning my body would process and all would be well. Not my luck this time, I could barely bend and getting out of bed was extremely painful. I texted Rob and then I called the advise nurse and of course they say come to the ER immediately.

So we get to the ER immediately and I was checked in within 30 minutes but then sat in the hallway on a gurney for about 6 hours and that's how long it took to get pain medication also. Finally, a wonderful nurse was assigned to me and got me on IV fluids and got pain medication and I had some relief. They did a chest x-ray, CT scan with contrast and then because they couldn't control the pain they admitted me to the hospital. After about 17 hours from the time I got to the ER I finally was in a room and getting constant care.

Shortly there after they took me do an ultra sound and then Dawn from Radiology came over to see if I was up to still getting my port put in. Of course, let's put in the port, I'm here. The port being put in wasn't so bad, hurt a little but over all was ok.

I then spent the next 6 days in the hospital and I saw my oncologist and she believes that my cancer is back and is attacking my liver causing it to enlarge which causes pain. So, our plan is to continue with the treatment we talked about and possibly adding another chemo agent after I'm done with chemoradiation.

I start chemoradiation on Monday and today I have to go in for another CT scan for my radiologist to ensure they are hitting the right spots when I start radiation.

Exciting news: It's nails and toes day!!! Woohoo!!! Mom and I are getting our nails and toes done and spending some time together today. It's a good day!!!

So we got some crappy news and I really haven't digested it all yet, but this damn thing will not take me down, not an option.

Thank-you everyone for all the prayers and positive thoughts, please keep them coming as this journey may have gotten a little longer.

Until next time,
Kate

3rd Chemo Treatment - Last one this round

Hello everyone, here's an overview of the last week. The 2nd chemo treatment wasn't too bad, only one bought of a fever but it only got to 99, so that wasn't bad. Only a few times did I get bone pain, but it wasn't bad either. More nausea seemed like this time, but was controlled with Compazine, so no vomiting. So all in all, not a bad week.

Spent time with the Hollands on Sunday and Emily and I made brownies and had our own girls night with myself, Miss Moomoo and Krystal. Granted the boys were here too, David and Derrick, so it wasn't completely a girls night until they left, but then we went to bed shortly there after. But the next morning I had to go do labs for my chemo appointment on Tuesday so Miss Moo and Krystal went with me to Vallejo. Miss Moo went back into the blood draw room and asked what the tubes colors meant and what was the stuff in the bottom of the one tube. She's so fascinated by all medical things and especially when it has to do with me. So we let her know that the teal topped one was for my coumadin levels, which is how thin my blood is. The Red topped one tests blood chemestry and the yellow one does the CBC panel and the stuff in the bottom of the tube stops the blood from clotting. Miss Moo watched as the tech put the needle in my arm and asked if it hurt, and I told her it felt like a pinch. I told her the tech held the needle against my arm as she took the tubes in and out so that the needle didn't move in my arm and hurt me. She was just so fascinated, it just makes me happy that all this medical stuff doesn't scare her and she can be involved in what happens to me. Although she is a little too excited for my hair to fall out in patches so we can do mohawks and color them, but that's ok, that day will come eventually and she just has to wait.

Tuesday was my final Gemzar treatment for now and mom was there to hang out with me. We set up my next appointments for when I have my 5-FU infusion and I found out that it will most likely start on Sept. 21st and I come in and get the pump hooked up to my port and then I have it in for 5 days and on Fridays I'll get disconnected, so I'll be pump free over the weekends. Then I repeat that process for 5 weeks. During the same 5 weeks I'll be getting radiation everyday, Mon. thru Fri. and my hope is that I don't get the burns and soreness until much later in the process, but I know that it will happen and I'll get through that too regardless of when it starts to hurt.

After we were done mom and I went to Subway and shared a BLT sub for lunch. I've been so very fortunate that my appetite hasn't been too affected by the treatments. Granted I still can't eat very much, but that works to my advantage. At my highest weight I weighed 383, I know, amazing huh? As of yesterday I now weigh 260 almost the same weight I weighed when I met Rob over 10 years ago. I must say it feels wonderful although all my clothes are a bit loose, but I'm ok with that too. The only thing I don't like much is that I get cold pretty fast and easily, but I just bundle up and move on. Yes I will post pictures hopefully today.

So I meantioned my port of which I don't have yet because no one told me to stop taking my coumadin and my INR (clotting rate) was way to high for a surigical proceedure. So I'll be getting my port this Friday. I stopped taking my coumadin and started taking Lovenox injections, which of course aren't that bad, but leave little bruises on my abdomen.

All in all everything has been going ok. I do get tired often and sometimes just spend the day in bed, but when I have the good days I manage to get quite a bit accomplished which is very cool and makes me feel "normal" whatever that means.......lol

Thanks for everyones support and help through this process and journey, it is greatly appreciated!!!! Rob and I can't thank-you all enough for the prayers and positive thoughts.

Be well,
Until next time,
Kate